Now my head was in a mess, I need ................., I didn't know what I needed!!!!!
Jogging always helps me clear my head - I'll go jogging.
I found myself jogging to the beach, it didn't take me long to get there, the beach was quite busy so I decided to sit a while, try to think, try to clear my head. On the table was a newspaper, I opened it up, staring at me were the photo's of me and Blueberry - turning the page not wanting to look at it any longer, something caught my eye at the bottom of the next page - there was a small column and it read...
"HOME FIRE TRAGEDY KILLS FIREMAN" "Bill Slate, Wishacy town's senior fireman, was tragically killed yesterday in a fire at his home, started by a faulty cooker .............."
I didnt read anymore - just sat there in shock - why had Charles not told me about this??
So I phoned him
"hello Charles, I ......"
"What do you want??" he said quite sharpley
"We need to talk"
"No we don't I said all I had to say last night to you Caine ......."
"Bill what about Bill???" I said quickly
"Look - I'm not up to this right now, come round tomorrow morning and we will talk, ok - bye Caine"
with that he hung up
I went home feeling quite hopeful which made me happy. Casey and Blueberry were in the garden playing chess and nattering and giggling like a pair of school kids. I wonder if Blueberry has told Casey what went on last night between us. I think i need to sort this out now before it goes too far!!! Walking past them on my way to the hot tub i asked her to join me
"Blueberry, join me in the hot tub, we need to talk"
She got in, sitting right opposite me - the sight of her was quite distracting, so I lay back closed my eyes and started talking, while she sat listening and not saying a single word. I told her all about Charles, how long we had been having a secret love affair, about the paper article, the bust up we had at the beach, about Bill and how now we were going to work things out - we didnt have to hide our relationship anymore and what happened between us last night was a mistake and should never have happened
"I'm sorry!!"
There was a large splash of water - it was then I opened my eyes to see Blueberry scramble out of the hottub and run into the house. Casey must have been listening too,
"Blueberry, wait........"
I noticed as she ran after her - was Casey pregnant again??
I followed them slowly into the house, all I could hear was vomiting from the bathroom. Blueberry was throwing up. Casey came out looking very angry.
"What the hell are you playing at Caine - you are such an idiot"
Casey screamed at me
"But out sis - its none of your business!!!"
"It is my business when ..........." I cut in before she had a chance to finish
"when nothing .........I said .... BUT OUT - I am off to bed!"
Casey must have asked her to stay the night, as quite a few times during the night I woke hearing Blueberry crying or in the bathroom vomitting. I pulled the covers over my head - if this was their ploy to make me feel guilty - they can forget it!!!
The next morning I went round to see Charles, it felt weird just walking in not having to worry any more that we might get caught. We spent hours talking, and arguing, but mainly talking. Finally we sorted things out between us and all was going well until he kissed me. He kissed me and I felt ............. nothing. No burning lips, no rolling stomach, no racing heart - nothing. Then it hit me and I pulled away. Why had I been so stupid??!!
"Sorry Charles I can't do this anymore"
"Can't do what?" he asked
"Us - I can't do us any more - I'm sorry - its over - I have to go - I'm sorry!!"
"What?????" I headed out the door and started running home. I needed to see Blueberry, I needed to make things right, Oh God, WHY did I tell her anything last night - I am an idiot!! How was I going to undo it all???
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At home Casey and Blueberry were stood on the front garden,
Blueberry told Casey she was pregnant as they had suspected.
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I rounded the corner to see Casey and Blueberry outside talking on the front garden, Casey went inside when she saw me coming, giving me the filthiest look .
"I'm not here to bother you - dont worry I'm just leaving" she said sarcasticly
"No, I need to .........." she interupted me
"oh and just to let you know you won't be seeing me around here any more, me and Casey will be hanging out at my place in future"
"Will you shut up and let me say something"
"There is nothing to say - I know the score - I hope you and your boyfriend are very happy together Caine"
"Blueberry listen - I'm Sorry ....."
"Shut up Caine I never want to see you or speak to you again - EVER - get me!!!"
She took off back home before I had a chance to say anything to her - I'll leave her to cool down and try and put things right between us tomorrow.
As soon as I got into the house Casey attacked me
"You are such a moron!!! What are you going to do now?? Charles - you kept that quiet, Blueberry told me everything - Oh you are making me sick just looking at you right now!!!!!"
"What am I supposed to do - I've just tried to talk to her and she told me to get lost - forever - wouldn't let me get a word in edge ways she's gone mad!!"
"And what about the baby??" she asked
"Yes - I noticed your pregnant again sis"
"Not my baby you idiot - your baby"
"What baby, you know i dont have one"
"She hasn't told you has she"
"told me what?"
"She's pregnant - you idiot - are you really so stupid?"
"No ....... she can't be" I was stunned
"Well she is and you better shape up and do the right thing - you know Mom and Dad are going to roast your backside when they find out about all this!!!"
I needed to think!!
I spent the next few days camped outside next door, ringing the doorbell, looking through the window, they just would not answer the door to me. On the odd occasion it was answered, Mikie or Cherry came out but would not let me in told me Blueberry wont speak to me or see me. She would not answer the phone to me and even on the computer if I logged on she would log off. I know I must have really hurt her, but she was not even giving me the chance to explain, to put things right. Not even Casey could help me, she talked to Blueberry till she was blue in the face - she would not budge. How was she going to know how I felt about her if she would not even hear me out. Then there was the baby - OMG - I was so not ready for this - but how was I supposed to prepare myself when I couldn't see it growing inside her, feel it kick, I couldn't even imagine what Blueberry looked like being Pregnant!!!
I was at work, things not going to well, because I just couldn't keep my mind on my job, I was going through the motions everyday I was becoming more and more frustrated.
My phone rang - it was Casey
"Caine, I need you, the babies coming, mom and dad are out, I can not get in touch with Aleksey, please can you come to the hospital - I cant do this alone"
"Ok Casey - I'm on my way - I will be there as soon as I can!!"
I left work early and rushed to the hospital - very surprised to see Blueberry stood outside and not Casey
"What the hell are you doing here - she snapped at me "I wanted Casey - not you!!"
"Casey just called me and told me she needed me here her baby was coming"
"Ha - looks like she has had us both, she had her baby earlier, she was supposed to be coming with me - not you - I don't want you here - Caine just go"
"No!!! I'm coming with you whether you like it or not - its my baby too - remember"
"Fine - but don't think this changes anything!!!"
Quite a few hours later I walked out of the hospital in a daze.
I was a dad - it was a baby girl and Blueberry called her Coral, which I quite liked.
I took them home and Blueberry actually let me in, I hoped she was beginning to soften a little
She gave me the baby to look after while she had a long soak in the bath. I fell in love with her straight away, she was so perfect. I could see she had my skin colour and my eyes. I held her until Blueberry came back.
"Here, give her to me - she needs her diaper changing"
I slowly handed Coral to her scared I was going to drop her. Our hands brushed slightly and I could feel my skin tingling where she had touched me
"Now you can leave" she said sharply
"Please Blueberry we need to talk"
No we don't - Please just leave I ........ we don't want to see you again -
JUST GET OUT!!"
"NOW THAT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!! I am not leaving till you hear me out!!"
"Please Caine, I am exhausted" she pleaded
Then coral started to cry
"OK - OK - I will go , but I am warning you, I WILL be back tomorrow and you WILL let me in - be warned that door will come off its hinges if you refuse to see or speak to me again!!"
"Ok - tomorrow - promise - Goodbye Caine"
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